bad math.

Why is love so often linked to praise?  In what ways does a gold star resemble a heart?

I do not love you for how well you fold socks, or how quickly you can solve a math problem.  Disagreements do not permeate my love for you; each disappointment does not bring the gauge closer and closer to empty.

Love is in it's own sphere.  Your actions can't touch my love for you; your agency does not affect mine.  Only I can choose to withhold or give love; no one can make that decision for me. 

Your love is not contingent upon the actions of another.  You own it; it is yours.  You can share it, or you can choose to hide it away.  But it can never be stolen from you; no one can ever take it away.

I know, this seems like a silly thing to say; you already know all of this.  You know that when you tell your two year old you not to throw their cup you aren't telling them that you love them less; you know that disagreements with your spouse don't come close to touching your heart.

But promise me you'll think about this when you are on the other side of the rebuke, when you are the one being disagreed with.  When that happens, remember that your mistakes don't take away from the love that other's have for you.  

Remember that praise doesn't equal love.

1 comment:

  1. I'm glad you found me! hah. and yeah i'm in art seminar. i fell asleep during this last one. oops. i'm an integrated studio arts major. but yes. we should be buddies. please.


You are wonderful.